KNOW YOUR WORTH: KEEP BULLIES AT BAY!

By Ritu Pahuja Tandon

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words cut me deeply.

The sentence above may sound bitter but that’s exactly what burns most of us- inside! Most of us encounter bullies at specific points in our lives. And while many believe that bullying only happens during childhood, unfortunately, bullying doesn’t always stop once you become a teenager or an adult.

If they regularly make you feel oppressed, belittled, humiliated, or de-energized, please know – you are being bullied! Sad but unfortunately true. Some people may act amicable on the outside but take unexpected swings at you. As passive aggressive bullies, they may make you a target of their gossip, sarcasm, and hurtful jokes.

Dealing with such behaviour is of paramount importance, for, if you don’t, you run the risk of carrying this pain and hurt with us into the rest of our lives, not to mention the impact it can have on our behaviour.

Though there isn’t one set formula to ease your way through the bullying experience. Solutions vary according to situations. However, here’s a quick lookbook to help you sail through!

A first-time victim should, at the outset, try to initiate a peaceful conversation with the bully. If that does not resolve the situation and you are made a perpetual victim, DO NOT BECOME A VICTIM.

YOU HAVE A CHOICE, A CONTROL OVER YOUR RESPONSE.

KNOW YOUR WORTH.

That’s where your power of tolerance comes into play. The power to tolerate is our ability to remain internally unaffected when situations and people are not our way. Choose to not be mentally drawn into the mess. CHOOSE CALMNESS. CHOOSE TO LET GO.

This may sound like a utopian ideology, however when exercised, is practical.

Let us understand it this way-

Flowers continue to grow and blossom even though weeds are beside them. In the same way, realise – I am living in a world where there are people around me who are so different, yet how do I respond to them? My strength is not only in how I respond, but also how I adapt and adjust. All these are signs of tolerating. So, I discover that tolerance is a strength not a weakness, it is a gift in a storm, the light at the end of the tunnel. With tolerance I mature and grow in experience.

Many people want to prove that they are right, that the other person is wrong. A tolerant person never needs to prove anything. The truth will always come out.

However, tolerance becomes a crime when applied to evil.

If you know that you are being constantly bullied and your patience and tolerance are being mistaken as your weakness, report the matter.

You MUST share your experience and emotions with someone you trust.

Seeking the help of the counsellor, if need be, should be done without any delay.

You may not know it, but all of us have a tolerance meter — an internal gauge that tells you when enough is enough.

These days there is growing social media intolerance. Unabated trolls, memes, hate speeches and what not! Journalists, politicians, celebrities, and activists. Unfortunately, we are faster than lightning when it comes to imitating public figures.

Embracing different opinions through tolerance is, therefore, an urgent priority.

So, next time, you come across an unpleasant situation, remember-

“I’m just a masterpiece trying to master peace!”